Tuesday, October 17, 2006

Cuckoo! Cuckoo! Cuckoo!

Jed Babbin looks to be about ready for the lollipop factory. Today's column is a series of random sentences leading up to the final paragraph:
It's a very good thing that Osama bin Laden isn't as smart as he thinks he is. If he were, he'd send one of those European-looking al-Q members to Havana to kill Castro. With Fidel dead and the assassin suitably shot to pieces, the world would be in an instant uproar, and we'd see a media feeding frenzy in Turtle Bay that would make the UN look like the courthouse in the Michael Jackson trial. America would be blamed and Chavez (Fidel's most ardent admirer and greatest supporter since Brezhnev) would go to Havana personally to supervise the restoration of the Castro regime. The Cuban-American community would be up in arms -- literally -- and President Bush would be caught in the middle. And what a fine mess that would be. Like I said, it's a good thing OBL isn't that smart. But both Bad Vlad Putin and his funny-named sidekick, Hu Jintao, are.

So there you have it -- the leaders of Russia and China are going to assassinate Castro in order to tip the House to the Democrats.

Babbin is ready for the nice men in white lab coats.

3 comments:

Jason said...

I tried to read the whole thing but I became too disturbed by the Ben Stein ad to go further. "Laugh with Ben, cry with Ben, live through Ben." What the heck?

Anyway, Jed reminds me of this guy. Make enough wild and random predictions and one of them is bound to come true.

Dave said...

Yeah, it's a sign that Republicans have gone over the edge when they start coming up with false flag schemes for their enemies to use against them. I mean, it's always a mistake to start believing your opponents' rhetoric.

Ya don't think maybe they been readin' too many of those 9/11 conspiracy sites, do ya?

Glaivester said...

It's a very good thing that Osama bin Laden isn't as smart as he thinks he is. If he were, he'd send one of those European-looking al-Q members to Havana to kill Castro.

So Jed Babbin wants Castro to stay alive and to keep ruling Cuba?